Boundaries

by Cheryl Merrick
Boundaries quietly
define who I am:
What I like
and what I don't;
What I can do
and the things I can't;
What tires me
and what energizes me;
What drains me
and what fulfills me.

Boundaries
garner my time
and energies,
and allow relationships
to deepen,
as they provide stillness
to restore my soul.

As Intended

by Cheryl Merrick

I saw myself as weak,
abnormal, and defective,
when I couldn't do all
I felt was expected of me.

Now, seeing more clearly,
I realize that The Lord
has given me the gift of empathy.

As I denied this gift,
I pushed myself beyond my limits,
destroying my health.

It is time to finally accept who I am,
and, with realistic expectations,
become the light
I was intended to be.

Why Wasn't I Healed?

by Cheryl Merrick
I pled for healing,
but it didn't happen.
I had children. They grew up,
and now I'm a grandmother.
Was I ever healed?

Yes, the Lord is making me whole,
but not by correcting some
defect in my body.
Instead, He is healing my soul,
by helping me understand
and accept who I am.

With this understanding,
I can set the limits I need,
avoid becoming over-stressed,
and, at last,
be healed.

Crossing the Threshold

by Cheryl Merrick

Here I stand,
hesitating on the threshold,
Wanting to enter,
but afraid to leave
the security I have found.

Can I hold my boundaries?
Can I say, “No”.
Do I really need to do everything
everyone would like?
Can I stick to my principles?
Can I maintain reasonable limits
on all the going and doing?

Directives

by Cheryl Merrick

I’m not to go the BYU ward,
     but to our home ward.
I’m to build relationships with
     family, friends, and ward sisters.
I’m only to go to school
     one afternoon a week.
I am to do the Visiting Teaching report
     minimally.
My exercise is to be moderate
     and my medication sufficient.

Setting Bounds

by Cheryl Merrick

Contentedly, I settle quietly within my my own field,
Knowing that I will no longer find myself lost
as I follow friendly herds to goals that are not mine

Secure in the protection my new fences provide
I, at last, find the time to be myself
and replenish lost energies

No longer trying to help everyone– Now!
I’ve chosen only a few to nurture

The Time for Ending

by Cheryl Merrick

My heart breaks,
longing for close relationships 
that can never be.

Day after day,
I tried to offer them love and support,
but all they could see was manipulation.

A gift freely given was seen as an attempt
to grasp control of their life, 
or as unconditional surrender to their will.

Closing Doors

by Cheryl Merrick

With hope I kept my door open,
trying to comfort, teach, and love
those who were weak and in pain.

With an empathetic heart I listened
and sometimes cried with them.
I longed to help them.

When the years passed
and my health began to fail,
I took a look around my room.